Closer to what?

Closer vs Closer to God

Two versions of the same song, or so it would seem. Basically both songs are about sex, but closer contains a cry for help, whereas closer to god feels more like rape.

Closer

you let me violate you First time?
you let me desecrate you
you let me penetrate you Obvious
you let me complicate you

help me Cry for help
I broke apart my insides Going to pieces
help me
I’ve got no soul to sell
help me
the only thing that works for me Sex as escape
help me get away from myself

I want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
my whole existence is flawed
you get me closer to god

you can have my isolation
you can have the hate that it brings
you can have my absence of faith
you can have my everything All I have is yours
Love?
help me
you tear down my reason
help me
it's your sex I can smell
help me
you make me perfect
help me become somebody else

I want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
my whole existence is flawed
you get me closer to god

all through every forest
above the trees
within my stomach
scraped off my knees
I drink the honey
inside your hive
you are the reason As stated
I stay alive

Closer to God

you let me violate you
you let me desecrate you
you let me penetrate you
you let me complicate you

I broke apart my insides
I’ve got no soul to sell
the thing that works for me
help me get away

I wanna fuck you
I wanna taste you
I wanna feel you
I wanna be you become someone else
just like an animal through sex?

you can have my isolation
you can have the hate that it brings
you can have my absence of faith
you can have my everything

you tear down all my reason
you see through all I hide
you make me perfect
help me get inside

Why do both versions feel so right to me? I know I use sex as an escape when I crave love. I really wanna love someone. I wanna be in love. I want more than just sex.

I’ve been listening to Closer to God on repeat for the last half hour. It keeps reminding me of what I’m missing. The only thing that works for me, while I wait for love, fucking. I feel so fucking empty. I’m loosing it. I gotta find love, or just get laid again.